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Thursday, January 20, 2011

Undateable

I've been thinking about getting back into the dating world when my shift changes, but I don't know. The last couple of years, I've been somewhat disgusted by the whole process.

I always feel like I'm on a job interview, competing with a list of other candidates who have better resumes. And while I don't mind feeling like that if I'm applying for a job, it strikes me as a very poor way to develop, you know, an intimate relationship with another person.

Which is kind of the point of the whole enterprise, I think.

6 comments:

KickinAssTakingNames said...

I with you 100%. Dating is a pain in the ass, although a bit less so if you're in a positive mindset to do it. I agree it can feel like an interview, and I hate bullshit small talk, although in my experience the sign of a decent date is that the conversation flows by itself and it doesn't feel like an effort. Don't know if you saw the video I posted on exactly this subject a few months ago. If not, go watch it. You'll crack up because it suits this post perfectly.

http://kickinasstakingnames.blogspot.com/2010/11/stuff-follow-up.html

i am playing outside said...

you're doable. dont worry. do something quick and easy like coffee so if it sucks you can bail quickly, and if its good you can carry on with whatever else you can think of

James said...

KATN, I don't mind the small talk really, or even the process of dating. What bugs me is this sense that I've got to "sell" myself, like I'm a marketable product instead of a person.

Truth is, I'm not a very good salesman.

IAPO, No doubt I'm doable. Indeed, if I were just looking for the doing, I'd have no problem finding it. But I'm looking for something a little deeper and more meaningful.

But what's a guy gotta do to get that? Go to church???

James said...

Oh, and it should be said that my job requires me to change schedules every 3 months or so. I never get a full weekend off, work the day shift only 1 rotation out of 3, and generally have pretty shitty hours otherwise.

It's hard, to say the least, being me.

Why date a guy like that when dating a guy with banker's hours is sooooooo much easier?

KickinAssTakingNames said...

Just stop it, James. Who cares if your schedule sucks? If you find someone you hit it off with and want to be with, you'll both make it work. I dated a cop for a while and he had a similar sucky schedule with weird hours that changed every 3 weeks, plus extra secondary shifts at even weirder hours. We made it work and it wasn't as big of a hassle as it initially seemed it might be. Focus on finding the right person, and the rest will fall in place.

uncle jim said...

You better change your negative attitude first. Dont give me this BS. I used to work the graveyard shift and always Friday, Saturday, and Sundays. Still found a way to get it done. Chicks dont want to hear the negative crap. Dont SELL yourself, be yourself. Let me know when your schedule changes, I have an idea for you.