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Saturday, April 25, 2009

Bea Arthur - RIP

Upon hearing of her death, I realized with some sadness that my long term goal of having sex with Bea Arthur will now go unfulfilled.

Thursday, April 23, 2009

Taser Porn

I saw this on Boing Boing and it's disturbing. Full warning: It's a naked dude getting tasered.

I repeat: A naked dude. Getting tasered.

It starts off peaceful enough, just a weird naked dude confronting the cops. The cops are even cool about it. They ask him to put his clothes back on, he refuses, they go to cuff him, he starts resisting, and well, things go downhill from there.

Watch it yourself if you have the stomach for it. After watching it, I'm convinced more than ever that the taser was designed for fat cops just like this, the pussies and sadists who think wearing a badge gives them license to fuck with people.

Naked Wizard Tased By Reality from Tracy Anderson on Vimeo.
Fuck the taser. Learn judo, you little bitches.

108-93

Having abandoned the world of pay TV, I missed the game last night. I listened to the first half on the radio (definitely NOT the same thing) and followed it online for a while, but I crashed long before the final buzzer. (The game started at 10:30 PM Eastern time, which seems quite cruel to the Hornets fans. It's a school night, people! Yeah, that's only 8:30 in Denver, 7:30 if you're on the west coast, but if you live in New Orleans, it's kinda late.)

Anyway, the Nuggets won big again: 108-93

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Me and Willie B

KBPI DJ Willie B has been a Denver institution since as long as I can remember, but this morning he kind of got on my nerves. I was driving to work and he was talking about torture, specifically about how it worked, about how torturing Khalid Sheik-Mohammed, a genuine Al-Qaida "official" (as Willie called him), led to the uncovering of the plot to fly airplanes into a Los Angeles skyscraper. Torture stopped a terrorist plot! The torturers saved lives! They shouldn't prosecuted...no, they're heroes!

There's only one problem with that:

The story is bullshit.

So I sent Willie an e-mail:
Haven't listened to the morning show since Mastodon's new record came out, but I turned it on this morning and WTF? You guys are talking about torture? Saying it works because torturing KSM stopped a terrorist plot in LA? Man, get your facts straight. That terrorist plot was stopped in 2002. KSM wasn't even captured until 2003. Look it up. I listen to you guys for the heaviness. If I wanted a lightweight Rush Limbaugh, I'd listen to him. Oh well...back to Mastodon I guess.
He replied:
Damn man, we can't comment on whats in the news w/o some bullshit like this, please man, I read it straight out the paper, chill hell out, we did one single break on it bro.. damn!.. wb
Willie can kick my ass*, so I left it at that, but damn!

I'm kind of sick of hearing how cool it is that the government tortures people. That's not cool, man. Not cool at all.


* One of his possible Halloween costumes last year was the Hulk and all he had to do was take off his shirt and paint himself green.

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

UFC 97

I caught this fight at my cousin's house and wasn't too impressed. Although I don't hate it like some people, I'm not the world's biggest fight fan so I don't really know who's who or what's what in the UFC world.

But I do know Chuck Liddell. He's a good friend of mine. We go 4-wheeling in the summer.

He's also a pretty respected dude in the UFC world and is one of the few fighters to gain some mainstream notoriety. That's actually how I know him. He's a bad ass with a gut and fists of fury.

And not to ruin anything for you, but this weekend, he got knocked out by a Brazilian dude named Rua (pronounced Hu-ah). The fight was so-so. The knock out was clean.

Rua smacked Chuck in the chops and he dropped like an anvil. He wasn't out, just stunned, but he was on his back on the mat. Rua, sensing the opportunity, pounced. He unleashed a flurry of ruthless blows directly on Chuck's face and didn't stop until the ref called it.

Chuck was powerless to stop it. It was doubtful that he was really aware of what was happening, brain bouncing around in his skull, blood dripping into his eyes.

And this is where the story gets sad. In all fairness, that initial blow was the knockout punch. Chuck's a tough dude, so it didn't knock him out, but he never recovered. And as soon as it became apparent that Rua had him and Chuck couldn't fight back, the ref should have called it.

But he let Rua pound Chuck's face into the mat for a few extra seconds to give Chuck that last chance to fight back. But he couldn't. He was down. He was out.

And he took more of a beating than he should have.

The Snark...It Burns!

I meant to post this earlier, but got side-tracked:


The Tea Baggers are protesting a congressional hearing today with signs that say "Where's our money?" Oh wait...no, I was wrong. That's not a Tea Bagger. That's a Code Pink lady.

These radical activist types are so hard to tell apart these days.

What Would Jesus Do?

It remains true that torture is wrong and it doesn't work anyway. But those who were willing to overlook the immorality of torture because it was super-effective in getting information from terrorists are going to have to re-evaluate their positions.

Especially when you consider these facts:
The C.I.A. officers used waterboarding at least 83 times in August 2002 against Abu Zubaydah, according to a 2005 Justice Department legal memorandum. Abu Zubaydah has been described as a Qaeda operative.

A former C.I.A. officer, John Kiriakou, told ABC News and other news media organizations in 2007 that Abu Zubaydah had undergone waterboarding for only 35 seconds before agreeing to tell everything he knew.

Hmmm, there's quite a chasm between "worked after only 35 seconds" and "we had to waterboard this dude 3 times a day for a month straight!"

Something tells me if we gave him chocolate ice cream three times a day and festooned his cell with balloon animals, the likelihood of getting him to talk would be about the same. The only difference?

Ice cream and balloon animals aren't evil.

And yes, kiddies, despite what George W. Bush and Dick Cheney have been saying all these years, Jesus has not changed his mind on this one. Of course, he's the type of dude who, with his unending patience, would say something like, "Father, forgive them. They still, after two thousand years of my teaching, know not what they do."

(And yes...it may seem strange for me, an atheist, to cite Jesus as a moral authority on this issue. But from this godless perch, the truly strange thing is for those folks who claim Jesus as their Lord and Savior completely ignoring his teachings!)

Updated: I was thinking about this on the way home and I'm not so sure Jesus would display much "unending patience" in this regard.

Imagine, during his execution, while he was actually being tortured by the Romans, Jesus made his famous "Forgive them, father, for they know not what they do" statement. (It's in Luke.) But he was talking about a bunch of pagans who had never heard the "good news." They never read the Bible or went to Sunday School. They were still sacrificing goats to the old gods, hardly even aware that a new faith would soon arise and alter human history.

In this day and age, we can't plead ignorance like those stupid Romans. If I'm reading the whole religion right, thanks to Jesus, we know what we do. Right? He is the way, the light. Through his word, we are saved.

That's how the story goes, right?

Monday, April 20, 2009

Nuggets Take Game 1

We just might make it out of the first round this year...