Saturday, April 18, 2009


Note to Republican leaders:

When they said "Hitch your wagon to a star," they meant "Hitch your wagon to a star," not "Hitch your wagon to a bunch of wingnuts who hate you."

Gresham Barrett, a Congressman from South Carolina, tries to be a model wingnut -- tyranny, check; taxes, check; talk radio bullshit, check-- but he's still not nutty enough for this crowd.

I'm not sure what that means for the Republican party as a whole, but I'm sure it's not good.

Friday, April 17, 2009



I was an anger ball about three hours ago --tough day at work, impossible drive-- but luckily I work with some really cool people.

I'm serious about that. I've worked with some really cool people in the past (like my buddy Big Daddy over at Bonjour Peewee, just to name one) but the crew I work with now are unusually cool.

I have no idea how they all managed to coalesce in one place or how I got to be among them.

Stuck Again

The weather has made travel difficult to impossible in this town. I spent an hour trying to get out of the parking lot, fishtailing and spinning wheels.

Finally giving up and resigning myself to yet another hotel stay...I ran into a co-worker who said he'd give me a ride home. Thank god for small favors!

When I said I couldn't wait to get home...I fricking meant it!


I hate Fridays.

You would think that since Fridays are a big movie-going day, perhaps THE big movie-going day, that theater operators would make sure that the staff was composed of the best and the brightest, and if they weren't available, perhaps the mildly competent.

But you would be wrong!

Oh no...they are scrubs. All scrubs.

I had a lady call me this morning to tell me that one of her plasma screens in the lobby wasn't working. (You've seen these lobby plasma screens no doubt while waiting in line for refreshments.)

So I ask her, "Which one isn't working?" You know, an important but hopefully easy question to answer...considering she's the one who is standing right there and has already observed it not working.

But I was met with the phone equivelent of a blank stare. "Uhhhhhhhhhh..."

Okay. Clearly I'm talking to a retarded person. So I'll make it even simpler. "If you were counting from left to right, which one would it be?"

They had four plasma screens. This lady only had to count to four. 1...2...3...4.

See? I just did it. It's easy! It's one of those skills most people master after watching a few episodes of Sesame Street. 1 plasma, (Ha-Ha-Ha) 2 plasmas (Ha-Ha-Ha) , 3 plasmas (Ha-Ha-Ha), 4 plasmas (Ha-Ha-Ha).

But I just got another, "Uhhhhhh...." because, you know, I was talking to an idiot!

So I simplified even more. " it the one on the left? The one on the right? Or is it one of the two middle ones?" You fucking help me out, lady.

But again...I just got the "Uhhhhhh" again.

Uhhhh, fuck you!

I can't wait to go home today...


Another weekend...another storm.

A couple weeks ago, I would have said I was annoyed by the inconvenient arrival of stormy conditions on my days off, but after a month of it, I'm resigned to NOT doing all the stuff I need to do around the house...hanging that gutter, sealing some of the leaks with gloop, re-caulking stuff and touching up some paint. I don't know why I'm so eager to get that stuff done when sitting on my ass is so much easier!

The upside? This will probably be the last time I hear "a possible eight to ten inches of snow" until October. I hope.

Thursday, April 16, 2009

Tea Parties - Conservative Dissents

Alex Knapp writes:
We’re barely four months into the Obama Administration, and we already have conservative TV hosts muttering about secession and Gov. Rick Perry of Texas back-handedly muttering it too! And in response to what? A modest tax increase that still keeps taxes lower than they were in Reagan’s day? A bailout of the banks that’s similar to the Republican led S&L bailouts of the late 80s? A controlled bankruptcy of GM that pales in comparison to the Truman’s attempt to nationalize the steel industry? Suggested income caps on CEOs that are nowhere near in scope or breadth as Nixon’s wage and price controls in the 70s? Come on!

From Poliblog:

Still, I find myself ultimately puzzled over these Tea Parties.

First, because it isn’t as if the spending just started–it has been going on for some time. Indeed, whether it is massive social expenditures (the Medicare prescription drug benefit) or bailouts (TARP, loans to Chrysler and GM, bailout money for AIG, etc.), not to mention war spending, it all started under the previous administration, and some of it has been going on for years. So while I understand at some point enough is enough, it is difficult for me to take seriously all of this outrage on this topic right now.

Second, there have not yet been any tax hikes. Yes, some are on the table, which encompass the moving of the top marginal bracket to Clinton-era levels. One may not like those levels, but I don’t recall street protests over them in the 1990s. Further, I would wager that (like J. T. Plumber), that the vast majority of people protesting will get tax cuts if Obama’s plan passing Congress. As such, there is some cognitive dissonance going on here that I am having a hard time sorting out.

E.D. Kain writes:
One wonders if Obama had lost, and McCain had implemented similar policies in his first months (which, despite all the tough talk on Pork is fairly likely) whether the Tea Parties would have ever gathered steam. Certainly McCain was no darling of the Republican Party, and yet the Big Government years of George W Bush were met with muted critiques - if any - by the O’Reilly’s and Glenn Beck’s of the world.
Read the whole thing. There's actual substance in there...not just mockery.

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Code Pink Junior

The local Tea Party Protest had a pretty good turnout, I hear. My brother made it down there, dragging Uncle Jim with him. Asked about the size of the crowd, "Thousands" was the answer.





Adventures on Colfax

I witnessed a scene much like this on Monday. I was sitting in the second story of the two-story McDonalds on Colfax watching my brother and nephew cross the street.

A police cruiser pulled up to the curb and two cops darted out. I didn't really register their presence until they fucking tackled this dude and started pounding on him. My brother was in earshot and heard one of them say, "Spit it out, you fat fuck!"

Seconds later, another cruiser pulled up, then another, and another. They converged on the scene, coming out of nowhere, bringing a pair of plainsclothes detectives with them.

I came down to get a closer view of the scene and was going to take a picture of the scene for the blog, but when I got down there, they had the guy on his belly, hands behind his back, ass hanging out.

Yes, his ass was hanging out. I wasn't going to contribute to the indignity so I put the camera away.

The lesson:

Don't sag your pants, kids. When you get arrested, you'll be lying there in the street with your ass hanging out. And maybe, not this time, but maybe you'll find a dude that will take a picture of your big fat ass and post it on the internet.

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Oh No He Dint

Oh yes, he did!

I counted at least 5 double-entendres (going nuts! whipped out! full-throated!) in the first minute or so. And then, the kicker at the end:
If you are planning simultaneous teabagging all over the country, you're gonna need a Dick Armey.

That David Schuster. He's a clever girl.

A Record-Setting Night

Last night I witnessed a sports performance of epic proportions. The Nuggets clinched the Northwest division, they tied the franchise record for wins in a season, and -–in a very impressive display of skill -—JR Smith sunk 11 3-pointers (also a franchise record and one below the NBA record) and scored 45 points, a career high.

It was a beautiful thing.

(I’ll post pics when I get home.)

PS. If we don't have to play the Spurs or the Lakers in the first round, we might even make it to the 2nd round this year. Not that I think we'll make it to the finals.

The finals belong to the Cavaliers...and whoever can beat us.

My nephew in his Iverson jersey that he bought on sale for $10. I considered buying one too, but didn't.

My brother and his Angel.